Learning to sleep independently with love - Tips from Maud Foolen, children's sleep coach
Sleep is a fundamental aspect of children's development and well-being.
Today we're happy to share a blog post by Maud Foolen of Slaapzachtmini, which offers valuable insights into sleep rituals. Maud gives parents practical tips and insights on how to lovingly guide their child toward independent sleep. Her blog emphasizes the importance of a consistent sleep routine, closeness, and patience in supporting children in falling asleep independently. While the approach in Maud's blog doesn't entirely align with the vision of our daycare center, Kideo, which focuses strongly on promoting biologically normal sleep needs with closeness and flexibility as key elements, we believe it's valuable to explore different perspectives.
Maud's insights can inspire parents and offer additional tools for creating a healthy sleep routine. We invite you to read Maud's blog and discover the valuable advice she offers. Her approach can be a useful addition to your own search for the best way to support your child's sleep.
Read on for Maud's full blog and her expert tips.
A question you often hear around you: "How do I teach my child to fall asleep independently?" As parents, we naturally want our children to sleep well. A good night's sleep is essential for our children's development, growth, and well-being.
Sleep can sometimes be a challenge for both our children and us as parents. However, it doesn't have to be difficult; with loving and patient guidance, you can help your child fall asleep peacefully and independently. In this blog post, I'd like to share tips and insights that can support you.
From birth, safety and closeness are paramount. In the first few months of life, your baby is completely dependent on your closeness and care. Babies don't yet have a concept of time and don't know the difference between day and night. Therefore, they need routine and peace. It's important to create a warm, safe environment where your baby feels secure. You can do this by:
- For example, a set bedtime ritual, such as changing clothes, singing a soothing song, and cuddling. This predictability gives your baby a sense of security.
- Skin-to-skin contact not only promotes the bond between you and your baby, but also helps calm your baby.
- Rocking or swaddling can help your baby feel safe and secure, just like in the womb.
It's normal for your baby to need help falling asleep at this stage. This is a process that will unfold with love and patience.
A foundation of trust
Around four to seven months, your baby slowly begins to develop the ability to fall asleep independently. This is a good time to encourage independence without abruptly letting your baby go:
- Make sure your baby sleeps in the same place more and more often. This helps develop positive sleep associations.
- Start by putting your baby to bed drowsy but still awake. Stay nearby and offer comfort when needed, but try to let your baby find their own way to sleep.
- Stay consistent with your sleep routine and give your baby space to get used to new habits.
Be patient and stay close. A loving approach will help your baby gain confidence in falling asleep on their own.
I know better than anyone what it can be like when your child isn't sleeping well. Due to physical unrest, my son also didn't sleep well for a long time. Know that it will be okay. Know that you can ask for help from friends, family, wherever you feel comfortable.
Discovering the world
From around eight months, your baby begins to explore the world more and more. This can be exciting and sometimes lead to anxiety, especially when your baby is put to bed and no longer sees you. A loving approach remains crucial during this time:
- Let your child know you're always there, even when you're not physically in the room. You can do this by talking or singing softly.
- Keep the bedtime routine clear and consistent when putting your child to bed. This helps your child understand that sleep is a normal part of the day.
- By putting your baby to bed according to their own natural rhythm, you create a predictable environment where they know what's coming. This can be reassuring.
Exploring boundaries
Between the ages of 1 and 2, children begin to explore their boundaries and want to assert their own will. This can impact their sleep. Remain patient and consistent:
- Explain in a loving way what the intention is, for example that it is time to sleep and that this is important for their growth and energy.
- Stick to a familiar bedtime routine. This provides your child with stability and security.
- Encourage your child to go to bed independently, for example by reading a book together and then turning off the light and leaving the room.
Imagination, fears and independence
From age 2, you enter a phase where new challenges can arise, such as separation anxiety, nighttime fears, and a growing imagination. These fears are normal, but they can affect your ability to fall asleep independently. Here are some tips for coping:
- Create a comforting environment: Leave a nightlight on and provide a favorite cuddly toy to comfort your little one when you're not there.
- Talk about fears: Take time during the day to talk with your child about any fears they may have. Reassure them and offer simple, loving solutions.
- Encourage independence: Let your child make small choices, like which pajamas to wear or which book to read. This fosters a sense of autonomy and helps them believe they can go to bed on their own.
A loving journey to independence
Learning to fall asleep independently is a process that takes time and patience. It's important to guide your baby with love, understanding, and consistency. Every child is unique and will move at their own pace, but with a gentle approach, you'll see your baby gain increasing confidence in themselves and their surroundings.
Remember: it's all about security and trust. By letting your little one know you're always there, even when they're learning to be independent, you're laying a strong foundation for healthy sleep habits that will last a lifetime.
Love and peace are key in this journey. Be patient, stay consistent, and savor the special moments you experience with your baby.
If you have any questions after reading this blog, please let me know.
🌙 On my Instagram @slaapzachtmini you will find all kinds of tips and tricks.
🌙 Would you like one-on-one guidance or do you want to get started yourself? You can find all the information on my website www.slaapzachtmini.nl .
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